Being kind ..to ourselves
It was world kindness day on November 13th when we were invited to pause and reconnect with one of the most profound practices we have: kindness. This is not just kindness we extend outward, but the kindness we so often forget to offer inward… to ourselves. We also don’t need a special day to do this of course!
It’s easy to think of kindness as something we give away - a smile, a thoughtful gesture, a helping hand. But in truth, kindness is a practice, and like all practices, it starts at home, within our own minds and our own hearts. So many of us move through the day carrying self-judgment, pressure, comparison, and silent inner criticism. We speak to ourselves in ways we would never speak to someone we love.
Yoga philosophy reminds us that inner kindness is key. Within Patanjali's Yoga Sutra - a collection of 196 verses that includes yoga’s ethical framework - the Yamas guide how we relate to the world. The very first Yama is Ahimsa, often translated as non-harming. It’s first for a reason.
Ahimsa asks us to soften the edges of how we treat ourselves and others. It invites us to create space, patience, compassion, and gentleness. It reminds us that harm isn’t only physical; it can be the little ways we speak to ourselves, the unrealistic expectations, the refusal to rest, the constant pushing.
When we practice Ahimsa inwardly, kindness naturally radiates outward.
Ways to be kind to yourself
Here are small but powerful practices you can weave into every day:
• Release self-judgment. Notice your inner critic and gently shift its tone. Try: “I am learning,” or “I am doing my best.”
• Rest without guilt. Rest is not laziness; it’s nourishment.
• Practice mindful breathing. Even three slow breaths can reset your nervous system.
• Set compassionate boundaries. Saying no can be an act of deep self-kindness.
• Celebrate small wins. Acknowledge your efforts, not just your outcomes.
• Move your body with love - yoga, walking, stretching. Let it feel supportive rather than punishing.
Ways to be kind to others
When our inner world softens, it becomes easier to extend that kindness outward:
• Offer genuine compliments, especially to strangers.
• Practice active listening. Let someone feel truly heard.
• Send a message to someone who’s been on your mind.
• Give without needing recognition.
• Be patient - in queues, in traffic, in conversation.
• Smile. It really does ripple outward.
Kindness doesn’t require grand gestures. It lives in the small moments, the silent choices, the quiet presence you bring to each day. You might find it helpful to journal at the end of each day. Just a few lines about how you were kind to yourself, and how you shared kindness with others can be a beautiful way to stay connected to the practice.
May your days be filled with softness, compassion, and love.
#westhampsteadyoga #private yoga #kindness